dating.com

So, a couple months ago some ladies that I worked with convinced me to sign up for an online dating site. I actually know a lot of people, a lot of friends, who have profiles on various dating sites and are wonderful, accomplished people and so I consented to try it out for three months and see what it's like. Well, thus far the social results have not really been worth my $19.95 (or whatever it cost), however, I have found it to be a source of great entertainment and a fascinating look at human nature and personalities. It's a gold mine. I have extracted a choice sample of comments that have been sent to my profile, which does have a photo of me and a brief description.
Anyhow. You can be the judges. Here we go:

Candidate descriptions:

"[He] loves loving and being loved." Duly noted. Great. Love is a divine attribute...

"[He] can name all jelly bean flavors blindfolded." Awesome. Sign me up.

"[He] loves giving massages." Delete!!

"[He] loves sports, big screens, BBQ meat..." and the list continues.

Now, I mean no criticism towards these people. I just read some of these recently and they made me LAUGH! There is a lid for every pot and I know they will find theirs and be wildly happy.

Then a couple gems from messages sent to me:

"You look so tiny in your picture." ????

And the message that contained only these two words: "You gorgeous" - LOL! True, brevity is the soul of wit but there are other issues here: A. silver-tongued? B. Grammar rules to the wind...

But, this one is the champion. This message truly appeared in my little message box:

"hey I'm not not really here for dating, I'm actually recruiting for a SpecOps team to overthrow a series of small Asian governments. It's a lucrative temp-to hire position, great benefits and amazing scenery. If you like storming beaches for good surf and roasting marshmallows by the light of flamed-out tanks, drop me a line..." If only it wasn't Asian governments that he was overthrowing. We might have made it work!

Ah, that's why I love people :)

General Mills

As part of my ward's quest for Zion, they have instituted family home evening group competitions. Yea, verily, verily. So, each family has chosen a family name. Our family is "General Mills," in honor of our group mother, Tracy Mills. We're her rat pack :) This month each family group was supposed to make ice cream sculptures using three cartons of ice cream. We debated a bit and ultimately decided to capitalize on the natural shape of the ice cream block, by making a little ice cream train. I volunteered to sculpt the coal car because it had the simplest design :) However, in my defense, the Earnestly Chocolate was a very difficult medium to sculpt with! That carton had an intense amount of caramel that offered no stability! Anyways. Here's our family's ice cream creation, as documented on our new family blog:

http://generallyfamiliar.blogspot.com/2010/01/you-scream-i-scream.html

Everything I need to know I learned in primary

Where's Whitty in the Land of the Sunbeams?....

It's clear from this picture that the seedlings of my testimony were cultivated in my early years of primary class. A couple years ago, my sister, Mariesa, began scanning all of our family pictures and came across this candid little gem. She emailed it to me and for some reason it always makes me chuckle. It's fairly indicative of my childhood, right there. I look at it and pity the poor teacher, who is trying to act amused as all of us kids wriggle about. However, in this picture it's pretty apparent that I am being the spazzy, disruptive one, closely followed by the kid in the red pants who looks like he's about to mount the table or maybe the blond smiley boy who is about to hit the floor at a run. I don't know what the lesson was about this particular week, but it looks like I had something to say about it :) I came across this picture the other night and noticed something in it that MADE MY DAY! What was I getting so excited about that day in primary? Well, I looked closely at the teacher and realized that she has a Tootsie Roll in her hand! Ha ha! There I am, showing off like Flipper so that my teacher will toss me a Tootsie Roll. Only candy would silence me?! Maybe. But not for long!

In defense of my leave of absence...

Four score and seven weeks ago (actually, an accurate estimate) I began this blog. It was supposed to really change my life, as it seemed to change everyone else’s. However, I just haven’t been able to get into blogging. I really like the concept of the blog. I think that each individual has a bit of the creative spark within them and blogging celebrates that. Blogging is a legitimate form of self-expression, express on…! Lots of my friends have blogs and I enjoy checking for updates. My roommate Tracy, darling Tracy, has a great blog that she updates diligently with all sorts of updates and anecdotes. Over the last year, our running joke has been that I check her blog to see what is going on in my own life. She’s better at blogging my life than I am! But, I have decided that I’m okay with that.

Reasons why I don’t blog:

1. I am too busy to blog about what I’m doing
2. Fear of rejection from blog readers – honestly, I think I am the only one that laughs at certain things and I should probably keep those things to myself :)
3. Phrases like “legitimate form of self-expression” and other such parlance can hardly be entertaining in the collective blog-o-sphere
4. It will take away from my allotted daily Facebook stalking time
5. Isn’t a journal enough?
6. On some days, words cannot do justice to the amusement of life. Other days, my life is too boring and my thoughts are all rubber and mush
7. Tracy’s blog is much cuter than mine

Reasons why I am about to blog:

1. After talking to a few friends the other night about the very subject of blogging, it came down to either I start posting on my blog or I have to join LDS Link-up :) There is nothing wrong with either.

I am chuckling to myself right now, because I realize that I am going to post this and no one will read it because my blog withered and died last year. I’m okay with that, too ;)

"Twenty-sevendom"

I can’t believe it’s the last day of February! The greatest, yet the shortest, month of the year is now coming to a close. I turned 27 this month. I have talked to a number of friends who really didn’t like turning 27, or who are dreading its impending arrival. I don’t know, though. I welcomed 27 with open arms and so far, it’s been good to me. If this month is any indication of what the other eleven months of “twenty-sevendom” can hold, I am pretty excited.

Around my birthday, as I reflected on “twenty-sixdom,” I decided I wanted to more time doing hobbies and trying new things during the next year. I feel like I’ve gotten into the rhythm of a full-time job and life in Provo, and now I want to branch out and be more constructive with the time I have. We’ll see how this goes, but this past week gave me some golden opportunities to try my hand at some new skills!

I spent the last few days in St. George at the Utah Art Educators Association conference. It was great fun. There was a room at the conference where people could go and “throw” pots, meaning make a ceramic pot on a pottery wheel. I’d never done that before, so I thought I’d give it a try. It was so cool—even better than the movies:) It was really enjoyable, pretty tricky but yet therapeutic. I made a small vase that is about 5 inches tall and wide at the bottom. We used three different colors of clay, so it’s marbled with grey, orangy-red and cream. It looks cool, and probably only because I had a ceramics teacher helping me with it. Alas, I had no camera with me, or I would have taken pictures of the process.

Also, my co-worker and I noticed that our hotel was right by Fiesta Fun, “where the fun never sets!” Last night, after the conference, we went to the batting cages. I haven’t batted for ages! I played softball officially one season in junior high and many unofficial seasons in the Young Women's "league" (ha!), but it wasn't really my thing. I was usually in the outfield, hoping the ball wouldn’t come my way. There must have been magic at the air at Fiesta Fun last night, because I was hitting every pitch! I had some doosies. It felt great! I think it was a little bit more therapeutic than the pottery wheel.

True Wisdom

I've never been a huge follower of comic strips, but I have always LOVED Calvin and Hobbes. I think it is absolutely brilliant! Calvin is one of the most profound philosophers of our era... Funny, wise, insightful, smart. They just make me laugh--it's the best of a kid's combined with the philosophy and social commentary of the best minds:

Some great Calvinism's are among my favorite quotes:

"You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help."

"Why isn't my life like a situation comedy? Why don't I have a bunch of friends with nothing better to do but drop by and instigate wacky adventures? Why aren't my conversations peppered with spontaneous witticisms? Why don't my friends demonstrate heartfelt concern for my well being when I have problems? ...I gotta get my life some writers."

And one more brilliant one from Calvin:

"I'm a simple man, Hobbes."
"You?? Yesterday you wanted a nuclear powered car that could turn into a jet with laser-guided heat-seeking missiles!"
"I'm a simple man with complex tastes."

So, as I am sitting here, cracking up, I'm wondering if maybe they're only funny once you've really explored the world of Calvin and Hobbes.... ? Maybe. If you have, enjoy. If not, I highly recommend it :)

Rainy Sunday Night Insomnia

I am dedicating this post to my amazing and inspiring roommate, Tracy. Among her wide range of talents, she is an avid blogger. She does something, and then she blogs about it--amazing turnaround speed! Well, a couple weeks ago the two of us were given personalized cake decorating lessons from the Bishop's wife. Next day, Tracy had pics and everything on her blog. Last Monday morning we went to the Draper Temple open house. We got home and by the time I had eaten my lunch, she had blogged about it. Tracy's been giving me pep talks, so I vowed I would blog this weekend. I have exactly 66 minutes to keep my promise, so here goes!

I have not been sleeping very well lately. Maybe it was the birthday cake, maybe the excitement of my new job, maybe it's part of life in my late 20's, I'm not sure. I just haven't been having really restful sleeps. I had one night last week where I actually woke up and felt like I had had a good sleep. In fact, I must have entered REM because I had a really vivid dream, in which I was dating Tom Hanks, who was just an ordinary guy, and I was Miley Cyrus but couldn't sing, so I had a voice double. Strange, but memorable.

So, I emailed one of my friends and mentioned the whole sleep issue, and we've been corresponding about that. I use Gmail, and one thing that I always find amusing are the side bar "attractions" -the random links to various sites that pop up to the side of the email based on key words within the text of my emails. So, when I looked to the side tonight, there was a link there that made my night! Usually if I can't sleep, I will lay there and try and act really relaxed, hoping to drift off again. If that fails, I either opt for reading awhile or eating cold cereal. Both of these have proved to be hit-or-miss. Little did I know that am going about it ALL wrong!! This ad that popped up tonight just might be the solution to my sleep problem:

Apnea? Play a Didgeridoo

It helps and it's fun. Big range of quality didgeridoos. Expert advice.
www.LAOutback.com/Didgeridoo/Apnea

Anyone got a spare Didgeridoo? It helps and, hey, it's fun, too :)